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小悟盆栽(第3页)

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“……嘁。”

五条悟搓搓她的脑袋,接着说:“这次去冲绳稍微有点棘手,老子一不小心就中了咒术,这家伙稍微有点难伺候哦,你会好好照顾他的吧?”

“嗯……”

事已至此,绘梨只好重重点头:“我会拼尽全力照顾好神子大人的。”

“嘛,虽然这东西也是老子没错,但充其量只能算是千分之一吧,你这样叫岂不是会弄混吗?”

“那怎么办……”

“小悟盆栽就应该叫‘小悟’没错吧?”

“……”

她露出‘怎么可以这样’、‘实在是太失礼了绝对不行’的表情,用力摇头表示拒绝。

“说过的吧。”

少年摸摸下巴:“小家伙有点难伺候,具体体现在每天都要听你喊他的名字,要听你说喜欢他,早中晚三次一次也不能落下哦。”

“……”

就算是笨蛋也露出了怀疑的表情:“为什么?”

当然是因为老婆迟迟不肯喊自己名字,有人急得快受不了啦。

“盆栽需要阳光和水,不给他足够养分的话就会枯萎,这么说很好理解吧?”

“……真的吗?”

绘梨低头看着小家伙,有点困惑:“哪有这样子的养分,而且我没有术式,我的话真的会有用吗?”

“因为小家伙最在意你嘛。”

五条悟拍拍她的脑袋,想着干脆一招解决:“嘛,总之就是这样,如果你不好好照顾,让小家伙枯萎的话,老子也会死掉哦。”

什么??

她吓得几乎快要跳起来,下意识攥住手心的小悟,抬头看着神子大人,下意识反驳:“死掉……怎么可能?神子大人是神明,死掉那种事……才、才不会发生。”

“会的哦。”

他捧起她的脸,让她没法躲避自己的目光。

“五条悟,虽然被那群老头子视为什么神子,但我啊,是一个不折不扣的人类,会痛会受伤,当然也会死亡。这么说清楚了吗?”

掌心的少女呆呆地看着他,接着睫毛快速颤抖起来,只是两三秒,眼眶就红了。

她又不是白痴。多多少少还是知道一点,比如神子大人要吃饭睡觉,还会生气会发火,这些都和刻板印象上面的神明不一样。

但是她从来没有想过神子大人会死掉。

“可是……神子大人最厉害了,怎么会、会死掉呢。”

“人都是会死的呐。上一个六眼不是也死了么。”

“但您是最厉害最厉害,比之前所有六眼都要厉害的神子大人。”

像是一个激进单推人那样,少女一样一样数起他的优点来——强大聪明空前绝后、温柔体贴举世无双……

五条悟自己都不知道自己有这么多的优点,他盯着她看,见她说几个词语就卡住停下来想新词,没忍住笑弯了腰。

“要费劲从你的小脑袋里搜罗出这么多褒义词,还真是难为你了?”

“才不是费劲搜罗出来的。”

她本来就因为想不到下一个夸奖的词汇而着急,听见这样的话更是急红了脸,气鼓鼓反驳他:“神子大人本来就、本来就有这么好!”

“哦,是吗?”

少年拿出手机,打开录音:“那你再说一遍吧,来嘛来嘛,就刚刚那个,怎么说来着?温柔体贴——没错吧?快说快说,到时候放进广播站循环播放……”

“这样不太好吧。”

绘梨还真的思考了一下,她其实也不是很明白,为什么神子大人在学校里好像很不受欢迎的样子,大家都躲着他走。

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