第57章 你跟我说大学（第1页）
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nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp现在可是早上，直播里面多数有着一些已经读书毕业，或者做点小生意的，有着一小部分读书成绩好的，能听到主播说什么的，比如冷雨夜就是其中一个。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp别的听不懂，但是这一小部分可听的明白，一脸懵逼起来，因为林凡居然说自己不会英语，那不是瞎扯淡么！很好奇为什么这么说。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp而二号妹子又开口了：“欧尼酱Howoldareyou”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp（哥哥，你今年多大了？）nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp这一句让林凡嘴角抽搐一下，因为老外根本没有欧尼酱这种叫法，只有小岛国才这么称呼。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp这装个外国人居然也装的四不像，还来一句欧尼酱。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡已经可以肯定对方纯属是要耍自己来开心的，竟然如此那么就装到底看着对方是如何表演的，说几句常用的过去：“NONONo！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp二号妹子继续说：“Whatsyourname”
（你叫什么名字？）nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡：“OKOKOk！你标记吧！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp二号妹子：“Howoldareyou”
（你今年多大？）nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡：“IcomefromChina，Chinaisthefirstcow！”
（我来自龙国，龙国第一牛批！）nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp这时候林凡自己都笑了，一边放开T键盘的手，一边开口笑。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp弄的水友们都一脸懵逼，搞不懂主播啥情况！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“凡哥，搞毛线，你笑什么？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“我怎么感觉好像做了什么事情，笑得贼几把猥琐！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“到底笑啥呢？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp一条条弹幕问着，林凡一边笑着说：“这妹子是龙国的，绝对不是外国妹子，因为老外不说欧尼酱的，特别那个酱字，纯属属于陕西的口音。”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“我怀疑对方想耍我，所以咱们下去，看看到底是不是！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp标记点是妹子标记的，而且还是一个打野点，标在这里让林凡更加肯定对方是要耍自己的，所以就将计就计继续下去！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp至于他是怎么看出来的，是因为监狱这几年获得的收获，里面什么人没有，堪比奥斯卡影帝人员一大堆。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp早期进去时候，袁老那里有烟有酒，而且林凡也能到处转转，当然里面的犯人也不敢对林凡做什么，因为都知道他不是犯人，若是动了，那么必须以后穿小鞋子，或者是死，不过谁想死啊，想死就不会坐牢了，虽然不能动手代表不能动嘴。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp所以一个个忽悠林凡拿点酒，拿点烟，不过一个个都没做太过分，都是叫他一起喝两杯。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp隔着牢房一起喝。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp那年才十六七岁面对那些曾在商场，黑道赫赫有名的老狐狸，哪里懂得那么多，直接给几句话忽悠住了。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp过了一年后，林凡才明白给忽悠了，换来的结果接下的里面时间里，让那些老狐狸见到他，都不敢贴近牢房，跑到角落或者床底下躲起来。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp所以二号妹子的声音已经带着笑味，让林凡一听就听的出来对方的意思！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp二号妹子意思的确如此，而且二号妹子在直播界身份也是有着很大名气，说起傻呆儿小霸王四个字让不少绝地求生玩家咬牙切齿！恨不得把她就地正法！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp因为在绝地求生经常开着变声器装成GAY调戏小哥哥，也或者开始先用原声调戏男人，到了调戏差不多时候，直接变成男声！把队友吓得想哭了！不少玩家遇到，都流的泪多过西湖的水了。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp接下来两个人，都在一边搜索物资，一边说话，而二号妹子若不是说：“欧尼酱Howoldareyou”
就是说：Whatsyourname！（你叫什么名字！）nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp而林凡的回答：若不就是nonono或者okokok，就是用英文说自己是龙国人！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp连续几分钟之下，傻呆儿玩的贼开心，也玩够了，觉得直接该进人下一个环节，直接用普通话大喊起来：“卧槽，你丫的不会英文，玩什么什么美服哈！我是问你多大，你回我龙国人干嘛？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡装作不知情一样惊呼说：“卧槽，你Tm是龙国人，是龙国人说什么英文啊？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp傻呆儿：“我还问你，你不会英文玩什么美服？你说，还是玩双排，有没搞错？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp整个直播间水友们看着林凡在演戏都在笑，不过现在还没人妹子是谁，有些人觉得很熟悉，但是早上原因，清醒度不够都没想起来。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“凡哥这演技，不去拍电影拿奥斯卡，实在是损失！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“因为直播而耽误的奥斯卡影帝！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“这个不错，奥斯卡影帝！嘎嘎！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“这演的，我差点就信了！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“差不多，若不是知道他会英文！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp连续几次之后，傻呆儿直接开口又问道：“你该不会未成年吧？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡眉毛一跳，知道好戏要开场了，不过还是没事人一样回答：“哪有，我成年了好不好！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp傻呆儿：“多大了？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡肯定不会说真实年纪，随意捏造一个过去：nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“我十九了！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp傻呆儿：“十九岁？十八岁现在是高三吧？或者大一？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡回应：“高三吧！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp这他没说假，十九岁的确差不多左右，反正对方又没问是读书还是工作，当然也没必要对她说自己还读不读书！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp傻呆儿一副恨铁不成钢样子说起来：“高三，现在距离高考还有十个月左右，你不好好学习，玩什么绝对求生？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“连Howoldareyou意思是问你多大你都不知道，你还不好好学习？而且还来打美服！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“英语那么差，还不去好好学习，考一个好大学，却在玩绝地求生！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“你对的起你老爸的期望吗？你对的起你老妈辛辛苦苦把你养大吗？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“你对的起吗？学习一定很差吧？连那么简单英文都不知道！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡偷笑着而且还插话问：“小姐姐今年多大？还在读书？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp傻呆儿停下继续说，回答他话：“我今年二十，而且我是读外语系的！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp回答完之后傻呆儿继续一副恨铁不成钢似的说着！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“你说你对的起你父母吗？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“上高三不好好学习还玩绝地求生！”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp一直没停没了的！nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp林凡笑也笑够了，而且给对方这没完没了的指责着，也是该反击的时候了。nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp“小姐姐，我在初三时候就已经不读书了，初中我都还没毕业，你跟我说大学？”
nbspnbspnbspnbspnbspnbsp这一句话出口，水友们亮大眼里，因为早已经猜出，主播肯定是要搞事情，但是没想到居然忍耐那么久，不过终于还是来了，纷纷拿着水果等待着。
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