第十七章 须臾二(第3页)
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明舟的目光亦移去了那摆放书信的物件上。
“周大人的信,但凡您看过,我已皆替您销毁了,这些…”
“您都还未拆阅…”
见女人凝望的瞳色泛着矛盾的痛楚,那侍女又赶紧接上了话。
“您若是不想看,明舟这就替您拿去烧了。”
说罢她便站起了身,却是还未迈步,自己的手臂又被那女人紧紧地拽住了。
“你这即便全部烧了,他还是会写来……”
回望着庄雅悲切绝望的神色,明舟满眼含泪,片刻后只能又愣生生地坐了下来……
“他对我痴情一片,本已是难遏…”
“自从知道我怀有身孕一事后,那质疑更变本加厉了起来。”
女人苦笑着,将目光垂去了自己尚虚弱的身子。
“我虽写了书信给茶茶,让她不必再接受那人的“好意”
,但她却置若罔闻,不仅不与我回信,更令她那小侍女次次来王府寻你。”
“我瞧那孩子可怜,怕她回去受了我那妹妹的责罚,便让你将子沛的信照单全收了下来。”
“娘娘……您…”
“您自己已履薄临深,却还如此顾及旁人…”
明舟抹去止不住涌出的泪水,哽咽的话语已是哀不可闻。
“我这么做,自有我的理由…”
庄雅挤出一丝温暖的笑容,又将泛着泪光的神色惘然去了别处。
“如今子沛…已疑心允珠所出…”
“若是让他知道真相,只怕他会一时冲动,对公主生出些破格的举动。”
“您这是担心周大人会…向惠国公主提出和离?”
“嗯,依他的性子,并不是不可能。”
“那我们可如何是好?”
“只怕…只怕那惠国公主对周大人一片痴情,又娇蛮任性,可是会惊动了皇上,生出些事端来…?”
明舟攥紧了榻上女人的手,满眼惶恐含泪道。庄雅缓了缓神,微微点了点头。
“此事…我与他已没有任何迂回的余地。”
“我虽也想留在王府里,不闻不问、踏实过日子,但是…”
“但是子沛他想不明白,也不会就此轻易放手…”
“就算…”
“就算有朝一日他周子沛想明白了…”
“但我那好妹妹…”
“她…”
“她能想明白吗?”
意味深长的悲屈愤涌在满眶泪水里,女人悲从中来,已不能自抑。
“我虽有错,但我愿意一生向佛,忏悔赎罪。”
“我只是不愿去伤害任何人…”
“如今…除了生死诀别,我、我只有这一条路可以选了…”
“明舟…”
“明舟…你能明白吗?”
女人紧握着侍女的双臂,抛弃了清高自尊的湿润瞳影中,是将些许希冀寄托进了侍女模糊的视野里。
明舟拼命点头,她明白,只有在自己面前,这倔强的女人才会卸下坚强的外壳,将内心善良柔软的一面坦诚而出。她声声应允着她的质疑,将她紧拥进怀中,百遍祈求上苍的同时,只愿这源源不断的宽慰能缓解她几近绝望的痛楚…
…
待侍女安抚好榻上之人,将她安置于被中,合上床幔,匆匆整理好衣裳走回院中时,那微挺着小腹的女孩依旧还望眼欲穿地立在原地。明舟不敢怠慢,她几下抹去脸颊的泪痕,三步并作二步地走上了前…
…
“狄娘娘久等了。”
她竭力掩饰着心中的痛楚,向眼前的女孩恭敬一礼道。
“这一年来,您的多番好意,让我们娘娘甚为惦念,如今她的心里…”
“很是过意不去……”
看着侍女缓缓道来的垂眸,这晚了整整一年的坦诚落入了认真聆听的耳中,女孩洁白的脸庞只渐显了几分细微的动容。
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