第75章 南北方区别(第2页)
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第三队人去找最好的裁缝绣娘,怕你冷给你连夜定制一套新衣服。
第四队人拖着一吨多刻着你名字的石像打算会扔河里。
第五队和第六队一队学狐狸叫,一队在疯狂的往鱼嘴里塞布条。
第七队人全副武装在旁边守着等你睡醒。
等你第二天一觉醒来,第七队全副武装的乡亲们呼啦啦围上来,拿起第三队人昨晚连夜赶工的明黄色绣着花纹的睡袍不由分说就给你套上了。
睡袍给你披上,一队到七队扑通一声就跪下了。
刚起床有点冷,你紧了紧披在身上的袍子一脸懵逼的走出帐篷看见外面老乡们连山填海的人数倒吸一口凉气不禁感叹
“噫吁嚱!这他娘的徭役用不上这么多人啊,啥时候十里八乡的乡亲都来了?”
还没有意识到问题严重性的你,想着人多力量大就对着乡亲们振臂一呼:“来!大家一起!白粥榨菜管够!乡亲们好好干!”
然后在乡亲们的欢呼中,你被乡亲们架在轿子上随着人群向一个方向进发。
在你的印象里,那个方向……好像是皇城?]
……
[“白花花的大米粥发给穷人,造孽啊!”
“请客,斩首,收下当狗”
“坏了!我成穷鬼了!”
“米在手,跟我走!杀黄四,抢碉楼!”
“居然给服徭役的黔首吃大米粥和咸菜,已经不是一般的反贼了,必须出重拳!”
“你们想造反啊!”
“有这样的虫豸在怎么能搞好国家呢?”
“我以野兽的心境,将替天行道的大旗插入朝廷的心脏!”
“莫道石人一只眼,搅动黄河天下反!”
小主,这个章节后面还有哦,请点击下一页继续阅读,后面更精彩!
“天无二日,民无二王。大王当为尧舜,舜既为天子矣!”
“放下我,放下我,你们这是害我啊。”
“十八子当有天下!”
“谁给他们发大米,他们就跟谁走。”
‘你想收买我吗?这是对我高风亮节的侮辱!’我本想这样大声斥责他,但是他给的太多了。
“将士都是很忠诚的,都是为效忠明主而生的。”
“忠!诚!”
当你能给服徭役的人提供足够的大米粥和咸菜时,你就是电,就是光,就是唯一的神话!他们就会连夜赶工一件黄袍子,一早给你披上然后跪在你的脚下——“唯恐米公不为王”
。
接着你会发现每天都在发生变化,你的身边不停有人消失有人出现,但只要你能白粥咸菜管够,就有无数的人才任你挑选,誓死效忠你这米大善人,咸菜总管,大米仙人,饱腹大帝口牙!
这时候哪怕你只懂平a,来来回回都是“杀鲸霸拳”
“鲸霸天下”
这两招,朝廷也宛如中了海虎爆破拳一爆千击的杂鱼一般,被你狠狠地侮辱口牙!
第一天:“不值一提的卑微蝼蚁妄图螳臂挡车。”
第二天:“不可明说的吃人魔王逼近县城。”
第三天:“食菜事魔的窃国大盗进入府城。”
第四天:“米公率义军占领中原。”
第五天:“白王的虎狼之师接近京城。”
第六天:“至高无上的皇帝陛下于今日抵达自己忠实的紫禁城。”
]
郭威:什么黄色睡袍,你们礼貌吗?
赵匡胤:你们太不礼貌了。
各朝皇帝齐齐捂着胸口,其实不看历史也成,就看后世那些奇奇怪怪的逗乐视频挺好的。
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