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第53頁(第2页)

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鬱南沉默了半晌,開口問他:「你後悔把玉玉帶到這個世界上嗎?」

出了玉玉的病房後,張鵬沉重的臉上才露出第一個笑容,「怎麼會後悔,玉玉那麼好,我一無所有,她卻選擇成為我的家人。」

鬱南喉嚨一緊。

像他們這樣的人,一直孑然一身,家人就像櫥窗里奢侈品一樣根本無法擁有。

張鵬:「是我不好,沒能讓她健健康康地來這個世界上,她小小年紀飽受折磨,我卻還在享受她帶給我的快樂,玉玉一定會怪我。」

鬱南伸手拍了拍他的背,「玉玉不會怪你。」

張鵬苦笑一聲。

鬱南一出生就被遺棄在產科,他覺得他是有資格回答這個問題的:「十月懷胎千辛萬苦,誰會怪父母把他們帶到這個世界上呢,小孩怪父母,向來都是怪只生不養,只養不教,你對玉玉很好,玉玉不會怪你。」

張鵬揉了把臉,吸了吸鼻子,「真的?」

鬱南:「真的,你是個好爸爸。」

張鵬站起來深吸一口氣後吐出,「我不會放棄玉玉的,這段時間我會很忙,你照顧好自己。」

鬱南:「好。」

鬱南回到公寓,心情很低落,忙碌這麼些天,是該和肚子裡的孩子做個了斷了。

他有能力像張鵬一樣,給這個孩子那麼多的愛嗎?

他會愛這個孩子嗎?

恐怕不會吧,畢竟自己沒得到過愛,連個模仿的對象都沒有,怎麼會去愛別人呢。

況且他和孩子的爹甚至連朋友都不是。

鬱南舉著手機,在掛號界面停了很久,沉了口氣,掛了個擅長打胎的專家號。

這個專家還挺火,號都排到了下周。

他躺在床上,手搭在肚子上,撫摸了半晌後,喃喃開口:「對不起。」

*

鬱南一覺睡到第二天,睡前他瀏覽了很多基金會的信息,選了幾個針對心臟病兒童的幫扶基金會,打算這幾天親自跑一趟。

他迷迷糊糊地做了好多夢,但夢到什麼他都記不得了。

若不是被電話鈴聲吵醒,他不知道還能睡到多久。

是周亞蘭給他打電話,鬱南有點恍惚,他剛穿越過來和楚究春宵一夜之後,第二天也是周亞蘭給他打電話。

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