第74章(第2页)
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敲门声响起时,她睡得正熟,门外的喊声像梦里听到的一样。
她听出了是黎若谷的声音,沉沉的困意让她连眼睛都不想睁开。她又想起了妈妈离开的、那个天刚刚亮的早晨,也是因为困得不想起床,妈妈走了。
“我知道你在里面,快开门,我真的很累。”
她的眼睛动了动,大脑似乎慢慢醒了过来,怎么像是他真的在敲门似的。
她挣扎地坐起来,揉着胀痛的太阳穴去太开门。
门外没有人。
她松了口气,摔上门,浑浑噩噩地往床边走,经过窗户,她却像突然想起什么似的,拉开窗帘,跳到窗台上往外看。
昏暗的路灯下,他拎起行李箱走下楼梯。
她终于彻底清醒了。
跳下窗台,又跳上椅子,把衣柜上的手机拿下来,十几个未接来电。
一个小时前,从他下飞机就开始打。
她确认了一下时间,她吃药后睡了才三个小时。所以,是他改签过机票了。她连忙跳下椅子,要准备拨回去,脚却踩到一个塑料袋,“啪”
地滑倒地板上。
她的腰像被摔断了一样,躺在地上,疼得直淌眼泪。
对面楼昏暗的灯光照进来,这个房间,半个月没洗的脏衣服扔得到处都是,食品包装袋,用过的纸巾,木地板上厚厚的灰……
疼痛过去后,她没有再打电话。
口很渴,囤的矿泉水喝完了。走去厨房烧水,拎起水壶,里面还有半壶水,不知道是什么时候烧的。
一股对自己的恼恨涌到胀疼的头上,她重重地把水壶掼进水槽里,坐在地板上歇斯底里的哭起来。
怎么把日子过成了这样?
为什么会这样?
她心里最后的一点侥幸都消失了,以后她会越来颓废,逐渐像行尸走肉。除了痛恨自己,贬低自己,恼恨自己,大脑将无法再思考虑别的。
上一次是抑郁了两年才到重症的程度,而这次从梦魇开始到丧失希望才短短一个月,快得以为痊愈的她根本反应不过来。
黎若谷第二次来敲这扇门时,是第二天早上十点。
房间看得到的地方都洁净得闪闪发光,刚洗的衣服挂了一个阳台,原来的计划中,只有买菜准备晚饭这项没有。
黎若谷显然也没有在这里久留的打算,站在门口,进都没进来,“现在有空吗?”
她看着墙,“等我一下。”
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