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第93章 找骂的老外(第2页)

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我眯缝着眼睛,右手握住一瓶啤酒,左手夹着一根点燃的烟,靠在酒吧大门口,将头斜着仰起,挑衅地看着他。

这傻逼看我一副流氓德行,估计把我当成了混子,于是努力压抑着怒气,生硬地问道:“听不懂,什么意思?”

“意思就是,你爹把你这个小蝌蚪遗落到人间就有了你,可是你的混账爹把你们娘俩踹了自己跑了。你娘找不到你爹,只能独自生下你这个混蛋儿子,但也嫌你太混蛋了,所以也不要你了,自己跑了。最后,你就没人教养了。”

傻逼老外听了个大概,好像没太听懂,但想到肯定不是什么好话。这时候周围的人群一阵哄笑,他就更知道是怎么回事了,一张红脸登时涨成了猪肝色,冲我狠狠一瞪:“你,你想,干什么?!”

我继续倚在门框斜眼眯着他,一口啤酒一口烟,好不自在,“我想你有点儿教养!你说你骚扰人家姑娘,被人给当众给拒绝两回,还继续没脸没皮,你的教养呢?!”

我使劲吐出一口烟,正喷在比我高了小半个头的傻逼老外脸上。

“shit!getaayfromme!”

(“该死!离我远点!”

)他也不管什么中文了,直接飙出了母语脏话。

我乐了,也学着他操着半生不熟汉语说话的样子,给他来了一句netg1ish(中式英语):“yourmother"

s!Igiveyoufanett!”

(“你他妈的……给脸不要脸!”

现场的哄笑声顿时爆棚了,有几个哥们把刚喝进去的啤酒喷了出来,几个姑娘也笑弯了腰。

这傻逼老外显然没听懂这句中式英语的真正含义。见我一副很嚣张且有恃无恐的样子,再看周围对他指指点点的路人,他脸上青一阵红一阵,显然在犹豫着如何应对。这时候和他同行的人出来跟他说了句什么,然后就拉着他匆匆离开了,估计是嫌他丢人吧。

我倒是不怕他翻脸动手,动就动呗,老子最近憋的火气正好没地儿撒呢。只要他敢先动手,国际友人又怎么样,我保证把他痛揍一顿给他长长教训,还能以正当防卫的姿态全身而退,所谓“十步杀一人,千里不留行”

,然后拍拍屁股整整衣袖,“事了拂衣去,深藏身与名”

不要迷恋哥,哥就是个传说……

就在我顿感无聊转身回到座位继续抽烟喝酒的时候,女歌手从身后叫住了我,“嘿,帅哥!”

我鄂然回,“叫我?”

“对啊,难道你不是帅哥?有没有兴趣上来唱一曲?”

我犹豫了一下,心想虽然没在酒吧唱过,但是校园演唱会我倒是经常被拉去救场,感觉应该差不多吧。虽然一直不喜欢在这种场合演唱,不过因为酒喝得有点飘了,再加上和傻逼老外那么一闹,此刻心里倒有点想泄的想法。

我撇着嘴笑着对她说:“你怎么知道我会唱歌,万一我五音不全呢?”

她不以为意,笑笑说:“其实,我认识你很久了。你是去年第一次来的“后海知道”

,听歌经常出神,而且眼神很特别。我想,看你这样,大概率不至于一点都不会唱吧?”

“行吧,自己挑歌,还是你来安排?”

说着,我一口将瓶中的啤酒干掉。

“随你高兴!”

她无所谓地笑笑。

我几口抽完手上夹的那根烟,掐灭烟头,走到乐队吉他手身边,“哥们,可以借你的吉他用一下吗?”

说着,我看向女歌手解释,“我要唱一比较小众的英文歌,你们可能没有谱子。”

她递给吉他手一个眼神,这哥们才犹豫着把吉他交给我。坐在高脚凳上,我轻拨了几下琴弦,才对众人说:“我唱一《ye11o》送给在场的兄弟们,希望面对你喜欢的姑娘,都勇敢去追求,不要在意她的羞涩和胆怯,要用你的真心去打动她——哦,不过也别跟刚才那二逼似的,看不清楚眉眼高低,实在不行,咱该撤就撤啊——”

现场的男人们立刻哄笑,尤其身边有女朋友的那几个,更是搂着女友亲上了,现场的热烈气氛又上升了一个高潮。

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