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第37章 陷入混沌(第2页)

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……

这一次,依旧如此。

【只要你内心不屈,它就会无止境地重复。】

“我知道……但若我屈服,就失去了改变的机会。”

白谛坐在焦土之中,半个身躯已被摧毁,仅存清醒的意识。

这一次,罗马大火燃烧了一天一夜,所有人都在火海中丧生,无人幸免,除了他,但也只剩下几分钟的挣扎。

“……很痛苦,重启的过程,包括现在,只能看着内脏被烧成灰烬,却只能等待死亡,备受折磨。可最糟糕的是,每次回来,我都清醒过来,精神和灵魂恢复最佳,唯有记忆无法抹去……这样活着,我感觉自己如同行尸走肉。”

【注定失败的结局,再怎么重复,也将一无所获。】

“我知道……我失败了,对吧?在这个时刻,无法逆转她们的命运。”

白谛低语:“如果回到更早的过去,或许能阻止这一切,但……”

【只能拖延,无法阻止。】

“是啊,到现在,我还是不明白核心究竟是什么……”

白谛睁开眼睛,望着圆月高悬的夜空,低声道:“在生死与重生的轮回中,我现了一个盲点,每次回归重启,我都难以控制情绪。说起来,自从那次见到塞内加的地下室,我就感到异样的扭曲,起初我以为是他人的问题,现在才意识到,这扭曲源自我自己——”

"

是什么时候,我开始变得如此扭曲呢?"

"

曾经的我,绝不会煽动帝王走向暴政,绝不会在都市的竞技场上终结一位月之精灵的生命,更不会忽略如此明显的线索……是什么,改变了我,不单是我,还有希尔德、尼禄,乃至更多的人。"

"

我的智慧衰退,变得嗜血而冷酷,被阴谋和无情裹挟。"

"

这座城市的月亮,隐藏着秘密。"

【……还欠缺一个关键因素】

"

确实,在无数次的杀戮中,只有一个人,始终缺席,她始终近在咫尺,是最完美的传递者,也是最不易察觉的疑点……她的表演无懈可击,若非深入思考,我永远不会现这个盲点,纵使将整个城市焚烧殆尽,也无法寻找到她的踪迹。"

"

维娅,她是月神的信徒,对吧?"

【维娅是半人类、半月精灵,拥有皇族血统,名为屋大维娅,异族养育长大。十三岁那年,她亲手杀死了同族,唤醒了月精灵的血脉,成为月神狄安娜的眷属。】

"

……我从未考虑过这种可能性,然而偏偏是她。"

白谛嘲讽地笑了:"

早该现月亮的异常,这个国度确实在月神的宠爱下,只是这份爱让人疯狂,不是吗?第三位帝王卡利古拉,第四任皇后茱莉雅,还有现在的尼禄。"

【月光的侵蚀,疯狂的回响】

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