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第三章 初识二虎上(第1页)

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第二日天亮,刘备给母亲做了一顿早饭,便告辞母亲准备赶路。

“儿啊,路上记得要照顾好自己,危险的事让兄弟们先上哈。我一个人习惯了,你不用担心。记住,多交朋友,这个年代pua好使,不行多哭哭也没事,能把朋友哭来就成。”

刘备也留下眼泪:“记住了,母亲,孩儿不孝!让您老一个人孤苦伶仃,您千万要照顾好自己,闷的时候找亲戚们多走动走动。”

“嗯嗯,放心去吧!”

说完刘母依依不舍,含泪送别了自己的儿子。

走到半路,刘备突然现身上带的盘缠不够,寻思回家带上凉席、草鞋贩卖,好应个急,便返回家中去取。

刘备返回,刚推开家门,就被眼前的一幕惊到了!只见屋内一张桌,连上自己的母亲一共四人,正在搓麻将。桌上还有烟、红酒、水果。刘备母亲一看尴尬不已,急忙把手中的烟熄摁灭在烟灰缸里:“备备啊,你怎么回来了?你三婶我们娱乐娱乐!解解闷!”

“乡下生活那么好了吗?乡村振兴啊,好事好事!老娘,如果是这样,我就毫无心里负担了,儿无忧矣!”

刘备说完,便扛了一捆草席、几双草鞋,又上前把母亲桌前的烟拿走了。

“这就归我了,您少抽,对身体不好!”

“哦哦,好的好的!”

“那我就不送你了,叫牌了!”

刘母指了指眼前的牌示意刘备。

“明白,妈咪!刚才送过了,再送就没眼泪了,那我走了哈!”

刘备说完,给众人鞠了个躬就走了。

只听身后:“真是个大孝子啊!碰!哈哈,玄德他妈,该你出牌了。”

刘备欣慰的笑了笑,耸耸肩,心情愉快的上路了。

也不知走了多久,刘备突然停下了脚步,深深长舒一口气,深情的往家的方向看了看,眼含热泪,又看了看四周,说:“三年没回家,奶奶的……走了大半天,三叔这个老六,也不告诉我集市在哪。我乃当世英雄,焉能死于迷路?传出去,岂不遭后人耻笑!”

边哭诉边抱怨,找了颗树坐下歇息。突然觉得肚子有点饿,抬头一看,身后大树上有果子,原来是棵梨树。

只见刘备起身单手握拳,对着树用拳背一拍,树上的梨被纷纷震落下来。此拳力道之大,把树皮都拍碎了。

刘备弯腰捡梨,一抬头,只见对面大树上钉有一块木牌,箭头朝右,上面用中英文写着“涿县新集市!”

几个字,顿时喜笑颜开,顺手扛起草席顺着箭头所指的方向赶去。

刘备来到了集市,现许多人在围观一块告示牌。凑近一看,上有一则招工启事:张记肉联集团,招退毛杂役一名,日薪三个大饼,购买跳楼险……

刘备边看边念:“招退役杂毛一名,日三个大饼……!”

边说便叹了一口气:“哎……!现在的企业就知道画饼,大环境本来就差,还遇上黄巾祸乱,乱世民苦啊!”

此时忽听一声大呵:“你瞎啊?!啥叫退役杂毛?是招退毛的杂役!你这厮,在这造谣,制造焦虑,居心何在?!”

“嗯?……”

刘备缓缓转身寻去,只见一人圆头黑脸,胡子毛像钢叉直立,两只眼睛像两个环形灯,盯着刘备。

刘备一看,吃惊得睁大双眼,倒退半步:“豁!好一个环眼奥特曼!为何辱骂于我,如此无礼?!”

“何为奥特曼?!辱我否?你这大耳朵图图!”

刘备听罢,冲对方慢慢抬起一只手,竖起中指说道:“什么图图,我这是佛相,Fuc……”

本想骂脏话,转念一想又忍住了,改口道:“F、F佛慈悲!你家住海边啊?管那么宽,呸!”

说完朝对方吐了口口水。

“呸!”

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