从捉龙鱼联想到玉罄书院的学院生活by雪涛(第1页)
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捉龙鱼那段写得虽然生动,但跟剧情主线的关联目前看来不大,新登场人物又太多,所以追连载那时难免感到有些食之无味,只想快转跳过这段。
重看一次以後则觉得,捉龙鱼那段除了带出新人物与一些人际关系(如齐世英、齐子明是齐家,水运庆是水家,陈容是陈家,凌光阁三家一次到位,此外大家也各有小团体),要更加突显的应该还有“技近乎道”
这一点吧?小篱笆受水凝寒的启,长期致力於精微控制,但累积修为还不到、能力还不够,有点像是一个很会考试的学生,精通考试诀窍技巧,但本身学问是否高深?是否确实都融会贯通,成为具有真正实力的高手?那倒未必。陶铁展现的厨艺却是真正的“技近乎道”
,细节讲究、实力非凡,让小篱笆开了眼界,是,她煮得还不错,但有没有陶铁这麽好?没有。相信小篱笆经过此事有所体悟後,修为应该会更加进益。
话说回来,在生死门和捉龙鱼被关禁闭後,就跳到引魂玉册,接下来又跳到与张家兄弟的重逢、与萧闲的纠葛,中间的学院生活一笔跳过,接下来又马上要太虚论剑,感觉好像有点太仓促了。我也想看他们这些人除了生死门那些课外活动外,上课时是怎麽相处啊!不一定要写思辩论道的过程,像《我不是丑小鸭》的秦秣讲烛之武退秦师那样,就算是讲师刚好讲到双色草有隐形水属性,小篱笆和陈容听到後回想往事,相视一笑也很好啊!嘿嘿,因为我也是半个容党,所以希望陈容能多有些出场机会。就算两人因为陈家的关系,在外面不能太热络,但以两人过命的交情,太冷淡也很突兀,希望陈容在小篱笆被掳走後受到刺激能大有突破,再害羞下去,什麽时候才能跟小篱笆有进展啦!
所以,作者大人有机会请多写些学院生活吧!(眼神闪亮亮)
来起点其实想当万年潜水艇的,结果不但在这里初次了言,还另外去看了我从来不碰的变身文丑小鸭……
我也希望陈容多多表现。问题是,小篱笆虽然能够自然而然牵起他的手,但小篱笆好像没有把他当成异性在看。像萧闲,第一卷6回以罗珏外貌出现时,小篱笆不觉得跟他同坐一床不妥,可是第二卷7回改以真面目出现时,同样一件事小篱笆就对他产生了男女有别的意识。陈容从侧面描写时我们都知道他很厉害,既是天才又能找到众香国,但从正面描写,目前却还太弱,不但能力尚未完全恢复,又常常害羞到有点口是心非失去平常心的地步,跟小篱笆的相处总是不太自然,如果小篱笆一直把他当成需要保护的弱者看待,要怎麽正视他,把他当个异性看?
所以不知道能不能多设计些桥段,让陈容自然而然渗透进小篱笆的生活?像是在夜雨灯下,手把手教小篱笆写云篆也不错啊。但如果要他做出进一步的举动,恐怕要把他灌醉吧,不然就得等他觉醒,筹划一番,让小篱笆自投罗网了。
结论:陈容你还是要振作啦,如果你不想只当小篱笆好友的话
=============作者回复================
某墨:雪涛亲你太美好啦o(n_n)o~(未完待续)
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